It’s been a long hiatus in my blog writing and the universe has been whispering in my ear that it’s time to start writing again. I’m not yet sure what direction this will go, but I’m excited about the possibilities.
Please feel free to browse through previous blogs while I find my footing. I look forward to reconnecting with you all. ❤️
~Namaste
Lisa

Breaking Hearts

When your own heart breaks it is excruciating, but watching your child's heart break is nearly unbearable.

Difficult decisions that seem unfair and unreasonable on so many levels have brought us to the point of causing this heart break in our little one. In the end we believe he will be much happier and successful, but right now it just feels bleak and sad.
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I wish I had a magic wand to make it all different, but alas that magic escapes me...again.

And now I'm reminded through my sister and my aunt of the wisdom to "wish that each moment happens exactly as it does." It is one of the most difficult things to do when their is pain and suffering involved. It is much easier when all is well. 

Allowing ourselves to be in the moments of pain and sorrow, to be with the ones we love in these moments without trying to fix it, smooth it over, make it better is so hard but so essential in our lives. It is the manifestation of the practice of lovingkindness and compassion...honoring all of who we are, all that life brings, and all that is possible...trusting that that the pain will end and through the darkness light will come if we can just be in the moment.

My favorite Buddha quote jumped off the page at me as I opened my blog today and seems so needed through these difficulties -  Hatred never ceases by hatred, but by love alone is healed. This is an ancient and eternal truth.

May lovingkindness fill your heart in each moment of each day. 
Namaste - Lisa  

Post script...I wrote this about six weeks ago, but couldn't bring myself to publish it as it was all too raw. Things are still challenging, but the light is beginning to shine through.

Expectations

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Expectations can get us into hot water quickly. When we expect someone to behave in a certain manner and they don't, we feel confused, disappointed, and often hurt. Even when the change in behavior is positive, the unexpected divergence from the norm can throw us off.

I begin each of my yoga classes with a moment of brushing away our worries and expectations. I began to wonder today what expectations my yoga students may hold onto, what ones I hold onto, and how this impacts our experiences. Each class I teach evolves on its own as I integrate ideas I bring with the needs expressed by my students. For me it is a lovely dance of balance, trust, and inspiration.  I can only offer who I am, I have no control over (nor any desire to have) how anyone incorporates what I say and do into their lives.

There is a strange dichotomy in my life related to this. In yoga I simply offer the class for people to take whatever they need with no strings attached. But in my parenting and the trainings I offer as a school social worker, I expect my children and my staff to take away what I am specifically teaching them.

When I offer what I have without being attached to the outcome as in yoga, I feel at peace. When those offerings are made with attachment to the outcome, I so often feel frustrated and discouraged.

Hmmmmm...

Can I parent and teach in other realms as I do in yoga? Practicing aparigraha, non-attachment, non-clinging, allowing my children and staff to take what they need without being attached to the outcome. Honoring where they are rather than expecting them to be somewhere they are not. Allowing them to integrate the information as it makes sense for them.

I read weekly from Pema Chodron's Start Where You Are during mediation class and have just realized while writing this that I have compartmentalized the teaching of that title to my yoga life and forgotten to carry it into the rest of my life. Yoga is more than our time on the mat, it is how we live our lives united our minds and bodies, being present and honoring where we are and others are at any given moment.


So with gentleness and lovingkindness, as I always tell my students, I notice this. I will strive to keep it in the forefront of my perceptions, being more aware of my expectations and how they impact my interactions and reactions. May you as well.

Namaste

Stealing

Stealing is one of those things I have always thought of as clear cut and simple. Then, this week Michelle used Asteya - sanskrit for non-stealing - as our meditation focus. One of the affirmations she shared related to asteya was "I am whole and complete." As I contemplated this, I realized that stealing does not always related to a concrete item being taken.

We steal confidence from ourselves when we call ourselves stupid, judge ourselves harshly, or decide something about us is not good enough. When we dissect ourselves, accepting only what we see as good or attractive, we cannot be whole and complete. When we rely on others to provide approval for who we are, we steal from our sense of self-worth. We all have strengths and weaknesses and together they make us who we are.

As parents we unwittingly steal from our children when we fail to acknowledge the many things they do well and criticize their mistakes too harshly. We teach them to steal confidence from themselves as well by creating those negative messages that live in their minds and hearts.

Of course we will be critical and will need to redirect, reteach, and determine consequences for negative behavior at times. But when I look through the lens of asteya, I am encouraged even more to take those extra seconds to think about my words with care, to keep mistakes in perspective, and to acknowledge and apologize when I am wrong.

I want my children to lift up themselves and those with whom they interact. Therefore, I must model this for them at every opportunity. Whether it is showing gentleness with myself, with them, or with others, modeling lovingkindness and understanding teaches them not to steal someone else's confidence and self-worth as well as to value and nurture their own.

May we all awaken to the light of our true nature, fill our hearts with lovingkindness for ourselves, and spread it in all that we do.
Namaste